Lovesick and running

Sad poem

I feel these old feelings creeping back
and they scare me
I;m terrified and silent
not knowing if i'm strong enough this time around
before i was young and restless
this time i;m just alone
all of this is failing
and i cant keep holding on
the same thoughts are creeping in
and i cant stop their forming
I feel the steel across my skin
I feel the pills i swollow
I feel the bullet in the chamber
My heart is racing
my eyes are dry
I feel the end aproaching
nows the time to die
I feel the old familar feelings
I think the old familar thoughts
I'm not me thats doing this
Forgive me
I dont mean to hurt you
I dont know why i do the things i do
last time i had a reason
this time i just feel recklace
and alone
I love you all so much
but i feel like loosing control
already lost my grip on all that i hold dear
i'm not doing this to hurt you
I do it for myself
I admit i;m being selfish
and all of this may sound like ramblings
and random little thoughts
I dont know what i;m saying
i dont know what i'm thinking
some day i'll no the answer
some day i'll feel like praying

posted by Rachel_Bachert @ 7:45 PM