Lovesick and running: October 2005

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Correction to a previous post

A reader brought to my attention that a comment i made on a previous post was not entirely acurrate and they were right....in the entry about my coworker i was very irritated that morning becuase i was already having a bad day (failed yet another chem Test) and she had been touching my stuff so i was venting. well in the last part of the post i said "maria cant stay mad at her" i ment Maria and Icant stay mad at her....cause even though she makes me mad and frustrates me she is very nice and it is really hard to be mad at her when she is standing right there being all sweet. this sweetness however is what makes me even more mad the next time she pisses me off cause i am also irritated that i hadnt stayed mad and gone with maria to talk to wanda.
but its all pretty much done cause she got a job in a lab...yes i am slightly green but i wouldnt have wanted to work in the lab she is going to be in anyway.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

SERIOUSLY-----Close your Fucking mouth

i'm sorry but i am up at the U right now trying to do my homework and there is this guy sitting behind me that is slapping his lips so lound that i can hear him over my music blaring on my head phones! like Seriously i have my music up so loud that if i turn it up one more notch it hurts my ears adn i can still hear him
I mean what is people problems? did his parents never teach him to chew with his mouth shut? Its fucking irritating.. i cant even work...i'm going to have to leave becuase other wise i think i am going to hurt him....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHDDJKSfhasdkjhfskJDHFWuefUWEHJFSKDanBGFVHvjhcBSAHDFBsehkdfbjksdbvskhdfWKEBFKJsdvbsdfvWBSF WehfuW HEFJBSVHJBSDVFWhebfvh wefh sjvbksdhvbfs;UDF HW;fbvsdjkbvsdkahg f;
SDHKVAH BSDFG
THATS HOW HE MAKES ME FEEL RIGHT NOW! i think ever nerve in my body is irritated right now SHUT OUR MOUTH YOU NASTY PERSON!!!!!!!!!!
anyone who knows me knows this is like my number one pet peeve......ok i have to get the hell out of here i cant take it anymore he is going to drive me completely insane.....

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Every cloud has a Snowy Lining:)

So things are going... I'm not as frustrated with my work mate today, school is school (three test left this week), friends are friends and Micheal and i are hanging out tonight....i feel like i'm just floating down the stream right now....
There is some drama with school i guess. The U seems to think that my dad isnt/hasnt been a full time employee for the last 25 years and now they want me to pay back all the money from my tuition waver wich is over $1000.oo. But my mom said that i am not to worry about it and to just concentrate on school and that she will straighten it all out. i hope she does and doesnt just forget about it....
Jere and Courtnie are Expecting the baby sometime in June...so i will be an aunt, so far i think i am getting excited about this. I agree with my dad that they really shoudl have waited untill they had a house of their own and werent renting from courts parents but how can i not be excited about a baby? its such a miracle...a little life inside her tummy right now..about the size of a lima bean.... I find it weird though that it has also made me wonder about weather or not i ever want children.... i used to want them but lately i have been begining to look at the world differently and i really am beginig to wonder if i want to bring a child into this world. its so harsh. and i know that its not always and that there are plenty of reasons to have a baby but i keep thinking about just how lucky i am who i am, with the parents that i have and the things that i have adn what if i cant give my kid all the things that my parents were abl;e to give me? or if i turn out to be the shittiy parent ever? adn how do you protect them...you cant be there every second of everyday and there are so many things out there that werent there when i was a kid. i mean i had never really heard of Pot untill Junior high, never seen it untill i was in college. and i look at my baby sister and the things she does and is exposed to and frankly is scares the shit outa me.
and then all this thinking about babies makes me wonder if its really all that important cause i may never get married either. i mean Micheal and i have been together for 6.5 years and we dont even talk about the "M" word any more. we used to back before it was ever going to be a reality but then after we went through the hard year or so and came out on the otherside we havent really talked about it. I've brought it up but i dont see him asking.
and its not like i want to get married now...i'm thinking in like a couple years...when i get my bachlors but i am not at all opposed to engagement...
But then i wonder if i really want that or if i am just struggling to find some sort or stable ground in my life right now because i feel like i am just drifting......not really headed anywhere....

Monday, October 17, 2005

ARG!!!!! Seriously, dotn touch my stuff!!!!!

I'm so irritated right now...i just got back to work and the new girl has messed with all my stuff...not just work related stuff but my personal/school stuff. I need to vent so i am going to make a list of ALL the things that my new coworker has done to piss me off sense she was hired....
1. Today: When i got back from class, My school cataloug was gone! it has everything for the next three years outlined in it.... I can see why maybe she would need to mess with work related things, like if Maria asked for something...but why the HELL did she take my catalouge? I mean what the HELL it has all my shit in it...well it did but she kindly put that in my box....
My boss said that she saw her with it but she didnt realize she was taking it...i dont care if she needs to borrow it but they have a whole stack of them next door that she can have...and to top it off i bet she marked all over it.....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH this is worse than Leah stealling my clothes and giveing them back dirty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2. Clean work area:Everyday she comes in and throws her shit EVERYWHERE! I cant work in clutter. i know this may be a suprissing point to anyone who has seen my room but when i am working i like/need a clean environment to concentrate...i get closterphobic with shit all around me
3. Work Computer is for doing WORK!: ok i will be the first to admit that i check my email, blog and IM while i am at work but i also do my work....I only mess around when there is a lack of things to do or i really need to vent, and sometimes checking my email is work related. but it's highly irritateing when i have work to do that requires my computer and she is sitting there with a stack of work next to her at MY desk IMing, email or just surfing the net. And then i have to go down to the Directors office and start the computer down there surrounded by plants and misc stuff because they are remodleing down there and the desk has become the "Storage area" while they do so.
4.Credit Card stuff: If you dotn know what you are doing DONT mess with my system! all she does is fuck it up and then if i dont catch the mistake its my ass...so far i have been lucky.but she will "log" stuff half assed so when you go to look things up not all of it is there. i spend more time fixing it than i would have if i had just done it all in the first place.
5.If your asked to do it do it: she has had the same 4 thingsto do on her assignment board practically sents the day she was hired and the only time any of it really gets done is when i do it. I've trained her in differeent things over and over and yet she still claims ignorance and then my boss just makes me do it.
Misc things:shes always late, and never gets introuble for it (V always got bitched and told she would be fired)
She barely ever finishes a job she is given
she doesnt listen to intructions
she hogs my desk
messes up my work area
stresses out Maria
and to top it all off she is ALWAYS way too Fucking NICE....it makes me want to puke....because no matter how made me or maria get she is allways so oblivious and sweet that maria cant stay mad at her or complain to Wanda about her....
I MISS V....

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Babe and Baby

I hade to put this picture on here. This is Micheal and Bear. I thought all you that dont know him might wonder what he looks like so there he is...my Babe...

BEAR!!! Micheal's new puppy~Enjoy

This is Bear...The newestaddition to the Osborn family....and a direct link to my family seeing he is my brother's "Baby's" pup. here he is at 8weeks and three days after Micheal got him.Look he already knows how to sit.....
And if you are wondering about his collar, yes that is a real bear claw. Micheal shot a black bear last season and made a necklace out of the claws, when he decided to name Bear he cut one of the claws off and put it on his collar...its his name tag.

And here is Scooter, Micheal's cat, hoding in the game room under a chair. He's not too happy about this latest addition but i think he will come around. Its just alittle bit of sibling rivalery

Sunday, October 02, 2005

P.S. i Hate girls equally too

I really really hate hanging out with, talking to and being around my friend and his girlfriend......SHE IS A BITCH ASS HOE! and you deserve more than a bed buddy....even after everything you said to me and how much it hurts i still think that you deserve more.....because part of me agrees with A and T that you were lying to me when you said it....
HEHEHEHE i know he will never read this....he doesnt even know that this blog exists. Plus he probably doesnt remember that night he sent me home crying, or what he said to make me cry and why i didnt talk to him for more than a month....shoot he was probably to busy with her to even realize that i wasnt talking to him.....

So angry!!!!

I am so angry at him right now!!!! I want to go soen there and kick him square in the nut sack! He makes her cry and sad and there is nothing i can do about it.....Some girl answered his phone the otherday when she called and he played it off....
I want to protect her from the feeling that i know are coming....settinging in like a cold cold darkness....but she wont talk to me.
If she hurts i'll hurt him, that fucking Jack ass....why are guys such jerks sometimes! I've been through it and i still dont know why....

Lovesick and running